Naughty or Nice

Over Thanksgiving in Virginia, my two sweet boys were playing in the dining room as the rest of us lingered over dessert, clinging to our time in conversation...it was a moment, a moment of peace...and, then I heard the cries of frustration bubble up from Whitt, "Bruce, you are making a bad choice!!! YOU ARE BEING MEAN!!!" These were fighting words...Bruce, true to his red hair and much like a volcano, erupted shouting back, "I AM NOT A BAD BOY! I AM NICE!!" (emphasis added with a foot stomp when he said "nice") The entire table was trying very unsuccessfully to muffle laughter. Why did we find it so funny? Not only because it came from just about the cutest package ever, but because it, at least for me, reflected the trap I fall into at times. We want to be "nice," desperately trying to be "nice" by our own strength, placing our self-worth in being viewed as "nice," and often being left in a state of bewilderment wondering what "nice" even really looks like. The problem is we fall short every time; our strength will always run out, leaving us with the tattered, empty remnants of anger, frustration, and disappointment. During this time of year, there is so much emphasis on being "nice," but true freedom to love begins in realizing just how "naughty" our hearts truly are...when we cease striving to be something we are not...the trading in of our "nice" for the lasting fruits of the Spirit (Galations 5:22,23) has its first birth pains in the discovery of who we really are at our core bringing clarity to our motives... Just as my two year old sits atop a slide, clinging to the sides, held back for a moment by fear, we sit at the top of our "self" (self-sufficiency, self-reliance, self-promotion, our self, our control...pride) held back by fear....but, there is hope...just like Bruce has a daddy ready to pick him up when he reaches the bottom and a brother willing to hold his hand on the way down, we too have a Father and Brother (Proverbs 18:24)...when we decide to let go and slide to the depths of our heart, there is the Son ready to hold our hand on the way down and the Father waiting at bottom of our innermost being, His arms wide open with sheer joy and love...loving us in all our "naughtiness," our downright ugliness...catching us, claiming us as His own, His prized possession...it is in that moment that we truly come to understand mercy, His bounteous mercy...and, once you grasp the depth of His mercy, the natural response of your heart changes to deepened trust and gratitude...as He scoops you in His arms, lifting you up in the air with laughter, you discover the feeling of peace...peace that passes understanding...you find joy in the thanksgiving in all circumstances...joy is peace smiling...this is the "nice," His love in us...skewed motives suddenly turn to a divine purpose in our lives as we seek to please the true lover of our souls...our Father in gratitude of His gift...His mercy, His Son. Ann Voskamp's wrote a beautiful blog here: http://www.aholyexperience.com/2011/11/the-first-real-thanksgiving/ She referenced Leviticus 7:11-13 The first time thanksgiving is mentioned in the Bible it is in an offering ALONG WITH the peace offering...we find His peace in thanksgiving...fellowship with Him...and, without understanding His great mercy by looking at the true nature of our hearts, our "naughtiness," is true thanksgiving even possible? The Thanksgiving Holiday and the Christmas celebration are just as intertwined as the thanksgiving offering and peace offering..."Peace on Earth, Goodwill toward men"...our peace on earth is a free gift we claim when we offer thanks...let us run to His overabundant, free gift like little children run to presents at Christmas time...without pretense, grabbing as much as we can. Yes, this Advent season I am finding the stillness, the peace amongst the busyness by daily recognizing just how "naughty" I truly am. May we live in His mercy and seek to serve by His grace.