Out of Three Stitches

Well, we had our first trip to the urgent care clinic a little over a week ago, and suprisingly, it wasn't with one of the boys....

Our Miss Mae was playing chase with her energetic cohort, Whitt, after bath time, and slipped on a shark costume busting her little chin on the floor.

I scooped her up, grabbed lovie, and drove to the clinic. By the time we arrived, her tears had turned into a slight frown which turned into a small smile when I told her we could watch "Mary Poppins" on the Ipad, and then, the slight smile turned into elation as her daddy walked through the door.

As we waited, enjoying our girl, I thought this is turning into a pretty great evening, a date night with Mae. Our children quite often get "alone" time with both Michael and I separately, but rarely get both parents to themselves...especially for the older two who often get lumped together like twins.

After a pretty pleasant hour and a half as well as a pack to numb Mae's wound, it came time for the three stiches, and I watched my girl's animal instincts kick in full force when she spotted the needle and thread. She literally climbed and scaled her daddy desperately yelling "Please NO!!!" and "I want my mommy to hold me. Take me home!!!"

After five minutes, the nurse gave us the options of either giving her anxiety medicine or bind her arms and body in a sheet. Feeling conflicted, we chose the latter trusting He would provide us with what we needed....along with the nurse's promise that it would only take a few minutes.

They wrapped her and laid her down allowing me to be the one to hold her head still, and in some small way, I felt like I was laying my own Isaac down. I leaned down over her, my eyes hovering directly over hers, and I began to sing her favorite hymns. My mom and I have often lovingly laughed listening to Mae hum along to old hymns like a little old lady in the back of the car, and as she heard those familiar songs, she relaxed with a look of trust and sweet acceptance (even under the strain of my glass-breaking voice).

And, then I felt...Immanuel was not just with us, around us, beside us, but also flowing through us. As I peered into my girl's deep brown eyes and she into mine, our spirits were perfectly aligned with a purity not of our own naturally bent hearts, but a purity only the heart of Christ can bring.

After a few minutes had passed, Mae looked over at the nurse, and I found myself ferociously jealous, just a small glimpse of what His jealousy must be when we take our eyes of Him even if just for a second.

They had finished and unwrapped the cloth around her and as she sat up, I knew He had resurrected and shined truth and life in an area of our relationship, softly taking it to even deeper depths....a place I didn't know was missing...and for once, I didn't feel the need to explore the reasons why in "self-awareness"....a place where my own mind can trap me at times...my heart just accepted His gift in gratitude.

I often think about God's timing...but that night I experienced a new aspect of it...His ability to transform a situation instantly...and, I also know He had that night planned for Michael, Mae, and I long before any of us were born....I went from holding back tears of pain for my girl to feeling tears of joy for the fullness and blessing of the moment and a greater glimpse into Jehovah Rapha ...bearing a new gift of love.

Since that night, she has clung to me a little harder, stopped to linger just a moment longer....always on her terms, with me always loving every minute of it.

So to my girl, my child who is the hardest for me to understand, who quietly and beautifully challenges me, and who I LOVE deeply to my core, I want you to be able to read this later in life when the unfortunate pain of this world has tempted you to close off pieces of your heart and I want you to stop and look at the small scar on your chin remembering the gift we were given out of the pain, the more wholistic view we received of our King, and more importantly remembering His overflowing and pursuing love of YOU......and love, my dear one, with the same courageous open heart you were given that night.

"He healeth the broken in heart, and bindeth up their wounds." Psalm 147:3

"He who believes in me, as the Scripture has said, 'From his innermost being will flow rivers of living water'." John 7:38