Unabashadely

I have dealt with guilt from the very first moments of becoming a mother, and over the past few years I have realized that guilt is the direct nemesis of joy, the joy that has been lovingly sent to us. Therefore, I choose to delight in praise and thanksgiving all the more when I feel the undercurrent of guilt slowly seeping in, and my beautiful two-year old birthday boy with the red curls has allowed me to do so with gusto.

I could feel completely guilty that I have really babied my last baby, I mean really babied!

BUT,

I prayed for this child, this baby, my last, and God has made me feel so loved with the gift of our red curls. He knew I needed a human barnacle turned koala bear who wraps and enfolds himself around me lingering just a little bit longer than the others ever did; He knew I needed a baby who has a bit of Mae's quiet confidence and independence as well as a bit of Whitt's energy and boyish excitment giving me glimpses back to my two other beautiful babies; He knew I needed a little one who fiercly grabs my hand and will assert himself with his booming deep voice when he needs a "mommy" fix; He knew I needed red curls that probably won't see their first haircut for another couple of years; He knew I needed a child who is not won over easily (this kid can give the stink-eye like no other) which makes his love for me that much sweeter with a heart-warming intensity to it; He knew exactly what I needed and more than I could have dreamed of, and I in turn have honored Him by unabashadly delighting in this child, soaking in every moment of babyhood-every giggle, cry, and sweet swishing sound of a diaper on the move; the intoxicating smell and delicate touch of soft baby skin; the moments of wonder and excitement experiencing the "firsts" of life-savoring all of it to the full, not allowing the guilt to rob any part of this joy sent to us.

God in His infinite wisdom has created birth order, the amazing intricacies of the one and only relational God....

And, in my mind and heart, it is no coincidence that the disciple John was both the youngest and called the disciple whom Jesus loved. The one who sat closest to and leaned his head against Jesus during the Last Supper....

You see, even Jesus "babied" the youngest of his very loved and treasured followers....

So, friends, overwhelmingly, brazenly, fully, and shamelessly baby your baby!

Happy 2nd Birthday, Red! The only problem with you my dear one is you make me want more and I wish there were two of you!

PS-Nothing says happy birthday like Daddy squirting whip cream in your mouth while at the beach!